Nothing
by Egypt
Summary: A disagreement between Logan and Regina leads to a revelation that Regina is not prepared for.


Nothing

By Egypt

The silence was almost deafening, stretching between the two and creating a distance despite their close proximity. Physically they were separated by only a few feet, but metaphorically they were miles apart. She understood that he really didn't want her here, but she never expected him to be this cold. They were not exactly the best of friends, but she had never known him to completely ignore her either. It was unnerving, and made her feel more than a little uneasy. Still, she stayed, sure that her discomfort was nothing compared to how he felt right now.

They sat in the living room of his cabin, she setting in a chair and he on the couch. They had shared a cup of coffee, but that had been it. He had not even spoken to her since her arrival, aside from acknowledging that she was here and telling her she could stay. She had stayed out of his way, giving him space and doing her best not to press him to talk to her. If she pushed too hard he would shove her away, so she kept her distance. She hated to watch him go through this alone, but all she could do was be there for him if he needed her. She was pretty sure he wouldn't, but there was always that slim chance.

Heaving a bit of a sigh she got to her feet and started for the kitchen, empty coffee cup in hand. She figured she would put her cup away and then turn in for the night. She doubted she would sleep, but that was nothing new. Sleep was not something that seemed to come easy to her of late. Most often she spent the night laying in bed staring out the window. It had been years since she had gotten a good night's sleep, but at least she could pretend enough to keep others happy. Hank had finally stopped bugging her about her sleeping habits, which had made her breath a little easier. She knew that he still worried, which was the sign of a true friend.

As she passed by Logan on her way to the kitchen, she felt him grab her upper arm and yank her towards him. A soft squeak of surprise escaped her as she fell to her knees, her coffee cup falling to the floor all but forgotten. He pulled her straight towards him, so when her hands reached out to stop her fall they landed on his thighs. She looked up at him, surprise evident on her face. The look she saw on his face was the usual stoic expression but there was something in his eyes that, for lack of a better word, scared her. She stared into his eyes, searching for the person that she knew. What she found was cold and detached. There was no sign of the man that she knew, nothing in there that looked even remotely familiar. That was probably what scared her more than anything, the fact that he didn't seem to be himself anymore.

Before she could say anything his free hand came up to her face, grabbing her under the chin and turning her head roughly to the right. Her breath caught in her throat as the fear increased. She tried to calm the fear, tried to trust that he would not hurt her, but the change that had taken place in him recently made him someone she did not even know. It was as if she were dealing with a stranger, and yet it was someone that she cared a great deal for. She knew that she could protect herself from him, but would she have enough warning to prevent him from harming her?

Out of the corner of her eyes she saw his head descend towards her neck. She squeezed her eyes shut and waited, not knowing what to expect. It was almost a pleasant surprise when she felt his nose and lips press against her neck. He breathed in deeply, drinking in her scent as he moved from her collar bone up to just below her ear. Her heart thundered in her chest, her body stiffening as she fought the feelings that coursed through her. She had always been attracted to him, but he had shown no interest so she had done her best to keep her attraction at bay, to keep him from noticing. There was no way to keep him from noticing now, he was too close. Not even her shield would be able to help.

"Logan..." her voice was a breathy whisper, strained by the position of her neck and the emotional strain.

He did not respond to her, his head retracing the line back down her neck as he breathed her in. He did this several times, breathing her in as his nose moved from her collar bone to her ear and back again. Each time Regina became more lost in her feelings, loosing grip on them. Her hands tightened on his thighs, her nails digging into the fabric of his jeans and no doubt leaving marks in his legs. He didn't seem to notice though, so intent was he on what he was doing. Then he stopped, his nose even with the top of her ear and his lips resting on her earlobe. By now she was breathing hard, her body shuddering now and then as she struggled to keep what little control she had left. Slowly his lips moved, and the words that slipped out sent a shock wave through her entire body, chasing the pleasure away and replacing it with dread.

"Who are you?"

His tone was cold, harsh and accusatory. Her entire body stiffened as she registered what he had said, her eyes flying open and her blood running cold through her veins. In an instant she pulled herself away from him, pushing her body backwards out of his grasp. That was not what she had expected, nor did she truly understand why he had asked such a question. The fear sprang to life as an instinct. Whenever someone had asked her name it had always been there, a fear of being found out, of being seen as an imposter or even a spy. She was none of those, but she had always believed that revealing her last name would make her such in the eyes of others. As an afterthought her mind considered the fact that something was wrong with his memory, that he had forgotten who she was. Perhaps that was why he had been so cold to her this past week. But somehow, deep down, she knew that was not the case.

"I am Regina," she said softly from where she sat on the floor several feet away, "Your team mate, an X-MAN, just like you."

It was the truth, and yet even as she said it she knew it was not what he wanted to know. In an instant he was off the couch and on top of her, knocking her flat on her back as he straddled her, his knees clamping around her hips at the same time that his right fist slammed into the floor mere inches from her head. She let out a small cry as his fist hit the wooden floor, her head turning to avoid the blow. The fear had now grown to full panic. She knew she could have defended herself, but she feared that if she did it would only make things worse. For the first time in her life she was afraid of him, fearing that he would hurt her. But more than anything, she was afraid that she would let him. Somewhere in the back of her mind she felt that she deserved it, and had rationalized that perhaps by allowing him to hurt her it would make up for the wrong that her brother had done to him. It was not a logical answer, but the human mind is rarely logical.

A growl emanated from his throat as he leaned forward, once again pressing his lips to her ear as his body settled atop hers. She could tell that he was holding himself up, but he wanted to make sure that she could not get away from him.

"I can smell it," he said in a cold whisper, "You smell like him. The same foul stench that clogs my nose every time he's nearby clings to you."

Regina squeezed her eyes shut against the sting of tears that burned at her eyes. She knew she could not fool him forever, but the words were too much. They cut deep, stinging at her pride and her individuality. She had tried so hard to distinguish herself from her brother, tried so much to show the world that she was nothing like him.

She choked back a sob but he didn't seem to notice, or care, as he spoke again.

"I recognized it the first time we met," he pulled back from her slightly, his eyes watching her face as he spoke, "But I couldn't place it. You've tried to hide it ever since then, trying to scrub it away with the scents of rosemary, mint and lavender. It doesn't go away, Gina. It's always there, just beneath the surface, coursing through your body just like the blood in your veins. His blood."

He said the last words with so much venom that Regina couldn't hold back the tears anymore. They began to stream down her face as she lay there, but somehow she still managed to silence the sobs. She made no effort to get away from him, no effort to explain herself to him. From his actions she surmised that he had made up his mind and nothing she could do would change it.

"Creed," she whispered tightly, "I am Regina Creed."

She bit her bottom lip as he rose above her, pushing himself off of her with his arms but not letting her up. His knees still held her waist, the pressure that they asserted giving her an idea of his movements even with her eyes squeezed shut. After several minutes his weight shifted. He sat back, settling his weight onto her thighs as his eyes continued to bore into her. She didn't move, keeping her position on the floor with her hands held at her sides. In essence, she was showing her submission to him.

"Why did you come here?" he asked in that same cold tone, "What was your plan?"

She turned to face him, disbelief evident in her eyes. Did he seriously think that she had come here to do him harm? That she had some kid of plan when she had arrived on his doorstep? How could he? She was his friend, his team mate. She had fought along side him for years in an effort to make the world a better place. Now she was met with distrust and suspicion? How could he feel this way about her?

"Plan?" she asked, that same disbelief coming through in her voice, "I didn't have a plan. I came here to be with you, to make sure that you were all right. I wanted to help if I could..."

"I don't need your help!" he snapped, interrupting her, "And I didn't ask for it!"

"Then why did you let me stay!?" she replied, her voice rising as she pushed herself up on her elbows, "Why not just tell me to go away!?"

"I needed time," he said as he got to his feet.

She sat up, still leaning back somewhat on her hands. She stared at him, confused.

"Time for what?"

"To make sure you were alone," he said matter-of-factly, turning towards the door.

"Do you honestly think I am that stupid?" she asked as she got to her feet, "That I would lead him up here? That I would plot with him to hurt you?"

He ignored her, walking out the front door and into the night beyond. She followed him, bent on getting answers. She wanted to know, needed to know. He couldn't think that badly of her, simply because she had kept her last name a secret, could he? She stopped suddenly, watching his back as he retreated further away from the cabin. Her heart sank as she watched him, realization setting in that he had suspected her from the beginning.

"Do you think that little of me?" she asked, her voice cracking slightly, "Even after all this time, after knowing me as well as you do?"

He stopped, now only a few feet in front of her, turning to face her.

"I think that little of everyone."

The tone of his voice was so cold, so distant. Those words cut almost as deep as the ones he had said earlier. Pain welled up in her, followed by anger at knowing that he didn't care for her at all. There was nothing there, nothing at all. He was just as cold as Victor was.

"That must have made it easy to kill Mariko."

Her words were said in anger, from a need to hurt him as much as he had hurt her. It wasn't until she heard the distinct sound of his claws popping that she realized she had made a mistake. With the same speed that he had used to topple her earlier he came at her, both sets of claws glinting in the light from the cabin. She back peddled, trying to get away from him but he was too fast. Before she knew it he was there in front of her, his right fist arching through the night towards her. He retracted the claws only seconds before his fist made contact with her cheek, the force of the blow knocking her backwards, her head hitting the ground with a loud thud. The world around her spun, everything going dark as she tried to regain her breath. From somewhere in the darkness that surrounded her she heard him growl, and the sound of the second set of claws popping from their sheaths again.

Somehow she managed to get to her feet, stumbling away from him as fast as she could go. By the time her head stopped spinning she was running full tilt through the woods. She ran as fast as she could, dodging trees and branches as she ran. In the distance she heard him growl in rage, the noise pulling at her heart even as it spurred her on. It hurt to know he was in pain, and it hurt even more to know that it was her fault, but what hurt the most was how much disregard he had for her. She was nothing to him.

Tears streamed down her face as she ran, her mind replaying what Victor had told her years ago.

"_If he ever finds out who you are," he said with a sneer, "He'll kill you. Even if he's taken you to his bed. Once he knows the truth, you'll be nothing to him."_

She had thought that her brother was wrong, that he was only trying to scare her. Now she realized the truth.

She ran as long as she could, as hard as she could, but eventually she couldn't run anymore. She had no idea where she was, and at that point in time she really didn't care. Curling up next to a tree she allowed the tears that she had been holding back to fall freely. Everything she had believed in was a lie, the world that she thought existed was nothing but a fantasy. She had been woken up in the cruelest way, and all of her hopes for the future had been swallowed alive by her worst fears. It just didn't seem fair. Still, she had seen the truth first hand. There was no denying it, no way that she could go back to the way things were. Once you saw the truth, there was no way you would fall for the lie again.

****

Regina opened her eyes to the sound of the woods. Birds chirped in the trees, animals scurrying through the underbrush. It was a peaceful sound, one that Regina had woken to for a week straight. However, this time it was different. As she sat up from her makeshift bed under a Canadian Pine, the events of the night before were fresh in her mind, so was the pain in her left cheek. Slowly she pushed her long blonde hair out of her eyes, ignoring the leaves and twigs that had become entangled in it during the night. She sat there for a long moment, not really sure what to do. Finally, despite her desire not to, she decided that she needed to go back to the cabin to get her things. There was no way she could stay here, not after what had happened the night before. She had also decided that she couldn't stay at Xavier's anymore either. She wasn't really sure where she would go, but she had to leave.

Holding back another wave of tears she got to her feet, taking a moment to steady herself before turning around and examining the trees around her. Checking the position of the sun in the sky she determined which way the Cabin was and began walking, not looking forward to seeing Logan again. Still, she had to go back in order to get her things, and the car she had brought up here. If she was lucky, maybe Logan would be gone and she wouldn't have to see him again.

As she moved away from the tree where she had spent the night she heard a loud thud from further in the forest. On instinct she turned around, searching the woods for the source of the sound. About fifty feet away from the tree where she had slept, stood Logan. Her heart skipped a beat as she met his gaze. Not because of attraction like it used to, but now from fear. He could come towards her at any time, finish what he had started the night before. She expected him to, so she was shocked when he turned around and simply walked away. It would take her years to realize why he was there, but that small realization was not enough to salvage what he had broken.

She watched him go for a short time, only long enough to assure herself that he would not come back for her, then turned and made her way back to the cabin that they had shared. In less than an hour she had her things packed and was on her way back out the door. As she passed by the living room she noticed that her coffee cup still lay on the floor where it had fallen the night before. Almost reverently she reached down and picked it up, setting it softly on the counter and staring at it for a few moments before turning and walking out the door.

****


End file.
